Let the wild rumpus start!

New Year's resolutions are something I've made in the past and have avoided in recent years, though this year, I will actively ensure that my resolution occurs. Last night, at a relaxed gathering with some friends, we all shared what our resolutions were. Some involved getting healthier, others were to become more worldly. One was to "f*** more shit up this year", which was my personal favorite.

Mine was to write more. Which is fairly simple, I guess, in theory, however; in practice, proves more difficult, as anyone looking to keep a New Year's resolution knows. In the past, I've vowed to lose weight, and have (sometimes). Other times, though, I just shrugged off my duties to the resolution gods and gave up a week or so after vowing to do whatever it was I promised I would abstain from doing.

I think a positive resolution (other than the desire to f*** more shit up) is to lose weight. I've struggled with weight loss my whole life, however; this year, I vow to not only write more, but to lose more weight. Balancing the two should be difficult, for as I write this, I'm devouring an entire chicken in a can.

A friend of mine, Chrissy, is a Zumba instructor, which is an interesting fusion of dance and fitness with a latin flair. Not Ric Flair, though, which would be awesome.

I, unfortunately, do not have the ability for something as intense as Zumba. Mostly out of fear for making myself look like a dipshit while doing maneuvers that other people make look effortless and cool. I've always been a fan of dancing, though, as a white guy, I am not predisposed to such rhythmic duties.

I'm more of a weight-lifting and stationary bike-type guy. Usually while blasting the "Rocky IV" soundtrack at full volume and pretending I'm gearing up to fight Ivan Drago. I can't imagine wearing one of my stained, ripped wife-beaters and walking into a colorful Zumba studio or whatever they are and dancing to Lady Gaga or Ke$ha, though both are artists I can easily listen to.

If there was fat guy Zumba, where dudes can blast Poison, Motley Crue, or Dionne Warwick and just go nuts, I'd be all for it.

C'est la vie. Zumba is neat. Any kind of exercise that works for someone is, which is nice. I have always found the stationary bike and weights route the way to go for me, personally, but those with the desire to shake their asses to Beyonce' should feel free to do so in studios, where classes are taught by Chrissy and fun people like her.

New Year's is weird. My mom makes "lucky beans", and for anyone who has tasted them, you know you're the most unlucky prick on Earth to be eating them. An interesting dilemma. Gaining luck through eating something so brutally disgusting.